When I was a senior in high school, I was given a writing assignment by my AP literature teacher. The assignment was to write a poem. Limitations were removed. It could be about anything.
As if through divine influence (or perhaps it was my subconscious reaching out), I sat down during class, and the poem effortlessly bled out of me.
Somehow, I remember the poem verbatim nearly 25 years after I wrote it. It’s a poem about my mom who passed away when I was 10. With Mother’s Day upon us, I woke up this morning inspired to revisit the poem and share it with all of you. I added one more quatrain at the end to bring it up to date, in a sense.
It just so happens that in a few days, I’ll be undergoing another psychedelic-assisted session to help me process the pain and loss I still hold. Writing about this and sharing it with others is part of that process for me. Thank you all for your love and support.
Here it is.
I awoke one morning eager to walk
The sun had perforated the trees
To slanderously pester my Father with talk
And demand justice for his follies.
“Why!?” I cried
For silence was no longer my duty
Love was erased with a lack of grace from my descendant tree
The Queen of birth that I once knew would no longer smile at me.
You see, death is rebirth when living in veneer spirituality
Thus I respect that the end of my Queen had arrived
Rising from a knelt portrayal of pity
A voyage of shadowed trust – of that I was deprived.
Alone in shadowed woods, my mind would often wander
Would my Queen be pleased with me, or would she even ponder?
Yet with this eternal dance from dark to light, I now see clearly
Change is a constant, still, I miss her dearly.
Thirty years have passed since I last saw my Queen
I wonder where she’s been, is she at peace, what has she seen?
My time, too, will one day come to an end
And when it does, I hope to see her again, embrace, and make our amends.
Oh, Andy. May this session bring you peace.