Clues #29: A poem to my mother

Happy Mother's Day everyone

When I was a senior in high school, I was given a writing assignment by my AP literature teacher. The assignment was to write a poem. Limitations were removed. It could be about anything.

As if through divine influence (or perhaps it was my subconscious reaching out), I sat down during class, and the poem effortlessly bled out of me.

Somehow, I remember the poem verbatim nearly 25 years after I wrote it. It’s a poem about my mom who passed away when I was 10. With Mother’s Day upon us, I woke up this morning inspired to revisit the poem and share it with all of you. I added one more quatrain at the end to bring it up to date, in a sense.

It just so happens that in a few days, I’ll be undergoing another psychedelic-assisted session to help me process the pain and loss I still hold. Writing about this and sharing it with others is part of that process for me. Thank you all for your love and support.

Here it is.

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I awoke one morning eager to walk

The sun had perforated the trees

To slanderously pester my Father with talk

And demand justice for his follies.

“Why!?” I cried

For silence was no longer my duty

Love was erased with a lack of grace from my descendant tree

The Queen of birth that I once knew would no longer smile at me.

You see, death is rebirth when living in veneer spirituality

Thus I respect that the end of my Queen had arrived

Rising from a knelt portrayal of pity

A voyage of shadowed trust – of that I was deprived.

Alone in shadowed woods, my mind would often wander

Would my Queen be pleased with me, or would she even ponder?

Yet with this eternal dance from dark to light, I now see clearly

Change is a constant, still, I miss her dearly.

Thirty years have passed since I last saw my Queen

I wonder where she’s been, is she at peace, what has she seen?

My time, too, will one day come to an end

And when it does, I hope to see her again, embrace, and make our amends.

Missing you, 

Andy